Many folks who travel can attest that dealing with certain hotels can be a headache. It seems that most hotels these days are more worried about getting every dime from your wallet than providing an exceptional guest experience for their “valued” customers. It only stands to reason that the “value” in the hotel’s equation only refers to how much the guests can benefit the hotel, not vice versa. And one of the worst experiences at a hotel is disputing a bill with a pigheaded manager. The manager in this fictional joke tries to saddle a man and his wife with a $350 bill; that’s well beyond the rate they signed up for. However, the husband has a trick up his sleeve that leaves the manager speechless.

A husband and wife were traveling by car from Key West to Boston. After almost twenty-four hours on the road, they were too tired to continue, and they decided to stop for a rest. They stopped at a nice hotel and took a room, but only planned to sleep for four hours and then got back on the road. When they checked out four hours later, the desk clerk handed them a bill for $350.

The man explodes and demands to know why the charge is so high. He tells the clerk although it’s a nice hotel, the rooms certainly aren’t worth $350. When the clerk tells him $350 is the standard rate, the man insists on speaking to the manager.

The manager appears, listens to the man, and then explains that the hotel has an Olympic sized pool and a huge conference center that were available for the husband and wife to use.

“But we didn’t use them.” the man complains. “Well, they are here, and you could have.” explains the manager.

He goes on to explain they could have taken in one of the shows for which the hotel is famous. “The best entertainers from New York, Hollywood and Las Vegas perform here.” the manager says. “But we didn’t go to any of those shows.” complains the man again.

“Well, we have them, and you could have.” the manager replies. No matter what facility the manager mentions, the man replies, “But we didn’t use it!”

The manager is unmoved, and eventually, the man gives up and agrees to pay. He writes a check and gives it to the manager. The manager is surprised when he looks at the check. “But sir,” he says, “this check is only made out for $100.”

“That’s right,” says the man. “I charged you $250 for sleeping with my wife.”

“But I didn’t!” exclaims the manager.

“Well,” the man replies, “she was here, and you could have.”